[recording starts]

[We Love Us theme plays]

Lard: "(Sings along then cheers and claps)

Mark: "Yes, once again it's time to play We Love Us, and it's someone out of Radiohead, and today it's Colin..Colin Greenwood, alright, Colin?

Colin: "Hello

Mark: "How are ya?

Colin: "I'm a bit flu-ridden, actually

Mark: "Oh, are you?

Colin: "Yeah

Mark: "Aww, that's a shame

Lard: "Bless..

Mark: "Where are you?

Colin: "I'm in a hotel in Portugal, actually, quite close to the airport

Mark: "Oh, are you? Right, are you on your own? Are you sort of lonely and feeling a bit bereft and miserable and grumpy?

Colin: "Well, I had to leave the others early from an Italian meal last night, which is very unlike me, I have to say

Lard: "Why, to do this?

Mark: "No, 'cos he was ill

Lard: "Oh, 'cos he's ill. Oh right

Mark: "Because you're the drinker of the group, aren't you?

Colin: "Oh, I don't know about that (laughs)

Mark: "I thought that...

Colin: "I have to make up for my brother being practically teetotal, I suppose

Mark: "So, you go out and drink...well, you've got to keep the family name alive, haven't you?

Colin: "Well, yeah

Mark: "Now then, talking about your kid, we've got to sort something out before we go any further

Colin: "Yep

Mark: "because...and there's something riding on this, is a question that...he gave one answer, we had another answer it was about you, you know, I mean it's difficult, it's a close call for you, because, you know, he could get four points, and then he could do you out of a foot-spa you see...

Colin: "Yeah

Mark: "So, it's up to you, you'll have to be honest or not, but anyway. What did you do you thesis on?

Colin: "Well, I have to say he was right, it was on Willa Cather

Mark: "It was Willa Cather. Fair enough. Very nice of you to say so

Lard: "Very honourable

Mark: "That puts Jonny on four

Lard: "Yep

Mark: "That puts Jonny on four, Ed is on two pending three

Lard: "Yeah

Mark: "Depending on how high Thom is, and Phil is on four as well

Lard: "Oooooooh! (laughs)

Mark: "Alright, anyway. Ok, so what are you doing in Lisbon, then, you lot?

Colin: "Well, we're doing some warm up shows before we go and play in Barcelona

Mark: "Oh, right. So have you played any yet, or are you just...

Colin: "No, we're going to do a couple of...a rehearsal today, then a couple of shows over the next couple of days

Mark: "Oh, right yeah

Colin: "(coughs)

Mark: "Oooh, you sound poorly

Colin: "Excuse me, I'm sorry

Lard: "Aww, bless him

Mark: "Aw, what a shame. I want you to have the foot-spa now, just as a sympathy vote

Colin: "Well, Jonny said if I corrected the answer that he gave the other day, then we could share it between us if he won

Mark: "That's nice

Lard: "Brotherhood, eh?

Mark: "Brotherly love, that's lovely, in't it? Well, shall we do your questions, and then you can get back to your Lemsip or whatever it is you're doing

Colin: "Thank you

Mark: "Aww, he sounds as rough as a ?? (check 02:08). Right then, now here's a good question, the rest of the band suggested this one: What song were you caught wailing and stomping on the end of, when you thought the tape had stopped recording?

Colin: "Oh, no!

Mark: "(laughs)

Colin: "Oh no!

Mark: "Inside information

Colin: "Oh, well I know what that is, yeah. It's also yeah...I think I had a pony tail at the time, which was equally appalling

Mark: "Oooh, dear!

Lard: "Oooooh!! Colin, no!

Mark: "That's a terrible admission

Lard: "Terrible!

Colin: "It was a song called Coke Babies

Mark: "It was indeed

Lard: "(Cheers and claps)

Mark: "Well, you've got a point, but was it worth the embarrassing admissions you had to make to get it?

Colin: "If I get the foot-spa, yes

Mark: "(laughs) Alright then

Lard: "Fair enough

Mark: "Which member of the band said this about Jonny? “He's excellent entertainment value, he usually costs less than a video”. This was taken from Dazed And Confused magazine, September '95. Who said that about your brother?

Colin: "That's easy, that's Phil Selway

Mark: "Phil Selway said that

Lard: "(Cheers and claps and plays a drum roll)

Mark: "Another question about Jonny: What does Squeeze's Cool For Cats, Jonny and dinner ladies have in common?

Colin: "Oh, my goodness

Mark: "Do you know this?

Colin: "That's a bit of a poser. I mean the first single he bought was Cool For Cats, I know that, on pink vinyl

Mark: "Right, yeah that's good, yeah, and what...

Colin: "And well, I remember because he brought it home, and our mum was outraged when she heard it, some of the lyrics, and the swear words or whatever, and she threw it away, but I can't remember anything to do with dinner ladies (laughs)

Mark: "Well, he used to sing it to dinner ladies

Colin: "Well, yeah, I can...I'm sure he did, yeah, yeah

Mark: "Is that a yes?

Lard: "“I'm sure he did” Yes!! Give the lad a point!! (plays drum roll)

Mark: "What, is that a point?

Lard: "Yeah, I would have thought so

Colin: "Yeah, yeah

Mark: "Well, alright, seeing as he said pink vinyl first, we'll give you three out of three so far right

Colin: "Cool

Mark: "Right then, you don't do any singing, do you?

Colin: "Especially not now, no

Mark: "Especially not now, alright then. So, alright, which song do these lyrics come from? “I call up my friend, the good angel, but she's out with her answer phone”

Colin: "Ohhh...my favourite, it's a song called Nice Dream

Mark: "Yeah, Nice Dream

Lard: "(cheers and plays drum roll) Nice Dream!!! (more drums) Nice Dream!!!

Mark: "Shhhhh...Lard! Shut up!

Lard: "I'm giving it a bit of showbiz

Mark: "Just turn it (sighs) oh, for goodness sake

Lard: "Oh, flippin' 'eck it's going horribly Pete Tong

Mark: "I'm sorry about this, Colin

Colin: "(laughs)

Mark: "You've got a perfect four out of four so far

Colin: "Wow!

Mark: "Get this one, and you know, it's only Thom that can get near you. Where would you write to, and I'm looking for a PO Box number here, for official Radiohead information?

Colin: "Back me up

Mark: "(laughs)

Lard: "No.

Colin: "Oh, god. OX4...

Mark: "OX4, yeah that's the postcode. PO Box number

Colin: "PO Box number? Oh god!

Mark: "(laughs)

Colin: "Oh, no! You got me, I don't know (laughs)

Mark: "You don't know!!!

Lard: "Oh ho!!!!! Woah!!! Game on!

Mark: "I don't know what we're going to do, well, it's PO Box 322, Oxford, OX4 1EL

Colin: "Oh, I knew that!

Mark: "You didn't!

Lard: "You never knew it! He did not!

Mark: "You blagged one point off us when you didn't get it, you're not having five. You're not having five points. You've got four. Everyone's on four, except big Ed, who's on two, pending three. Alright, Colin, well enjoy the rest of your stay, hope you get well soon

Colin: "Cheers. Haven't I got to ask a question?

Mark: "You what?

Lard: "Yeah, ask a question

Mark: "Hang on, everyone's shouting at me! Will you shut up?! Everybody. For goodness sake. Now then, what's your question, Colin, for our fantastic Barcelona competition?

Colin: "My question is...it follows on from Phil's question about our first ever single and EP, the Drill EP

Mark: "Mmm hmmm

Colin: "What I'd like to know is: What's the last track, the name of the last song on the Drill EP?

Mark: "Right, ok that's question number four, set by poorly Colin out of Radiohead, and you collect all the answers, last one tomorrow, and you can win a trip to Barcelona, you collect all the answers in, and we'll tell you where to send them, well it'll be the same address as usual, won't it? The Breakfast Show, Radio 1, PO Box, all that sort of stuff, won't it? That we usually do

Lard: "Summat like that

Mark: "Oxford Road, Manchester, M60 1SJ. Alright, Colin, well we'll see you in Barcelona, and thanks for getting off your sick bed to do this

Colin: "Thanks very much

Mark: "Alright then

Lard: "Bye!!

Mark: "We'll see you soon, Colin out of Radiohead!

[We Love Us theme plays]

Mark: "Jolly good. Round five out of five tomorrow, and that will be with Thom

[recording ends]